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Occupy Melodies

New York New Yorkers have been singing lots of fresh new songs over the past couple of months. They sing on the street, and in the park, and on the bridge. They even engage in what George Orwell once called “group-sing”. They sing syncopated 4/4 call-and-answer crowd-pleasers, sung with the People’s Microphone, at plus 120 beats per minute, many of them throwbacks to the 60′s anti-war folk era. That old standby “Hey Hey, Ho Ho”, while explicitly unsung throughout the movement, inspires many of the cadences you hear in modern day protest music. “The People United” as widgetized below, has the same feel as this revolutionary classic. To sing it is to realize a tambourine is never far behind.



The iambic rhythms of the “hey-HEY” and the “ho-HO” are kept intact, but the tempo has been souped up; it’s practically house music at 134 bpm. “The People United” like many Occupy melodies, is completely monotonal. In the example above, the protestor sings around an F#. Try looping the drum beat with the chant, and dropping a few F# bass bombs on top. I read somewhere that Jay-Z is going to do a mash-up, co-opting this little Occupy melodie [sick].

Minor Thirds
But the songiest protests of the Occupation are the call-and-answer chants such as “This Is What Democracy Looks Like” which encompasses an actual musical interval. Drag and click on the score below to hear the Minor Third interval between the antecedent phrase “Show me what…” and the consequent phrase “This is what…”

Democracy is clapping on the ones without shame.

Sometimes it’s a Major Third interval, when the antecedent protestor is over-zealous, but usually it’s Minor all the way. Chanting Minor Thirds is a popular way to go, as Seconds are too small for anyone to care about, and Major Thirds and Fourths are too big for anyone to sing. But even the noisy mobs at a modern day sporting event can sing perfectly pitched, albeit profane, Minor Thirds. Minor Thirds are what makes minor music sad, and there is sadness here too. All minor 3rds are the blues, as the saying goes.

Here’s my personal favorite, “Shame” by OWS. It is a 4/4 song, as they all are, with staccato accents on the ones.



NYPD also like to make music, but none of that acoustic hippie drum circle crap. The boys in blue make electric music, using their favorite electric instruments―the Long Range Acoustic Devices, or sound cannons―that drone triple forte (ƒƒƒ), also known as ‘fucking fucking forte’, and drown out all melodies in their path.

Like a thousand crickets crying out from a flaming field. Like every siren of every squad car from your local precinct all sounding at once. I have to jam with it.

By the way, did I mention:

THIS, IS, THE 99TH POST! THIS, IS, THE 99TH POST!

All politiks is art: It fart.

Mmmm Mmmm Mm Mm Mmmm



The postprandial song is the perfect compliment to a meal eaten in silence. After all, it ain’t polite to sing with your mouth full, but you’d never know that from looking at my mic. Who knows from whence this song came? It’s the kind of thing that just ain’t on the internet. My guess is the South, Deep South, buried anonymously somewhere in America’s dark past.

horseThe postprandial song consists of octaves―octaves that make you go mmmm. It’s a funky ass groove too, alternating octaves with portamento bends going up and down. This is known as a ‘murky bass’ or ‘broken octaves’. The example above is near an F# octave. The high F#‘s bend up, while the low F#‘s bend down. The final tone actually bends a little lower than the second tone, because of the singer’s sustained gastronomic delight.

Maybe Pythagoras himself invented the postprandial song: sitting down to his straight edge veggie meal, in deep musical meditation, lured into song by the rhythmic mastication of his disciples, he begins to hum the blessèd diapason.

Major Laugh Made Ya Laugh

People in the 40′s used to laugh in major keys. Man’s guffaws and woman’s’ cackles were tuned to each other―an octave apart―and the glee of their sons and daughters lol’d like a pop choir. But those were jazzier times then, when it was okay for boys to laugh like birds, and girls to cry like dolphins. People didn’t just eat their words in those days, but full sentences as well, and whole songs too.

One such song from the Golden Age of Joke Songs with cow-bell-slinging kazoo-toting Spike Jones and nice-and-keen shaven Benny Bell, is the Woody Wood Pecker Theme that features Mel Blanc’s major laugh melody below.


The laugh is an F# Major chord in Second Inversion meaning the root is transposed to the 5th, the C# in this case. The whole thing ends with a series of triplets on the major 3rd, the A#. Though the melody is in F#, it only hits the root in passing in the rising triplets.

The Woody Woodpecker laugh sounds suspiciously like the “Charge Melody” played at Basketball games. They are both Second Inversion Major chords, played in the same arpeggiated manner. Did the Woody laugh melody inspire the early NBA organists to quote the well-known leitmotif in their charges?

Yes; yes it did.
,m

The God Chord

I heard there was a secret Chord, that David played, and it pleased the Lord.

Behold! The God Chord.  It has all the notes; the Gamut.  To play it, or any of the 11 Sacred Inversions is forbidden, but here it is anyway.  Just drag over the colored unstemmed noteheads.

Men are flat.  Women are sharp.  Boys are sharp.  Audiences are flat.  Gods have perfect pitch, but sing godawful Chords like the one above―the one that will swallow your soul.

I’ll swallow your soul.  I’ll swallow your soul.

The Schumann Scale

It’s an arpeggio. No, It’s an octochord. No, It’s the lick of Thunder and Lightning.



Black unstemmed noteheads played on HAARP

THE SCHUMANN SCALE is based on extremely low frequencies (ELF) in the Earth’s electromagnetic field. Lightning strikes create electromagnetic waves in our atmosphere, which excites the Schumnan Resonances. The global averages are listed above, with the equivalent notes that form a scale seemingly in the key of B. If you had antennae in your ears, you could hear the resonances all around you, though most of them would be far too low to be pleasing. The scale above is transposed up five octaves, to a B2, and synthesized on midi-strings for easy-listening.

The resonant frequency (7.83), has a wavelength equal to the circumference of the Earth. This golden frequency is in the theta region of the brain, home to the mu rhythm. Global military communications capitalize on this frequency. When converted into sound waves, 7.83 is a flat “B-2″ (two octaves below the lowest note on a piano). It is also the keynote to which Nikola Tesla tuned the North American Power Grid. The electric powers hums at 60 hz, the ninth overtone of the Earth, and loudest note from Space―B1, or Deep B. As seen in the chart above, the electroencephalograph of every enbrained organism, our terrestrial score, and the feedback of our machines, are all tuned, or attuned, to this flattened B. The B is the Tonic of our Sphere. Was Tesla electrosensing when he decided on his famous note? Did he speak the language of waveforms? Or practice zazen?

Musical Analysis
When equally-tempered, the above eight Schumann resonances form an arpeggio that spans two octaves, and can be broken down into two tetrachords―B13 and Cdim7 (the first and second measures above). Confined to a single octave, the Schumann notes fit neatly into two keys―Phyrgian Dominant, #6 (B, C, D#, E, F#, G#, A), and the Diminished, or Half-Whole Octatonic Scale (B, C, D, D#, F, F#, G#, A). In support of the latter key, it is interesting to note that the four most audible overtones of any musical sound make up a Dominant Seventh chord (1, major 3, 5, minor 7). This chord is found twice in the Schumann scale: B Dominant 7 (B, D#, F#, A), and G# Dominant 7 (G#, C, D#, F#). Dominants sevenths in intervals of minor thirds are the stinkmark of the Half-Whole scale.

The planet’s pop music rarely uses the Earth’s electromagnetic scale―The Schumann Scale―even though the ground we walk shapes it, the ether we breath conducts it, the heads we carry think with it, and the gods hurl it back at us.

Human Earth Tones
Some human beings can actually sing the Earth tone. In 2002, Tim Storms of Waterloo, Indiana, set the Guinness World Record for singing the lowest note, the Deepest B, the 8 Hz B-2. He has a range of Six Octaves, and performs this feat in a hand-puppet show. In 2005, a Chinese music teacher, Li Wenxing attempted to crush him with three additional semitones. He composed a very special song for the occasion. I’m pretty sure he lost.

tim storms          little fiery mario vocal chords
                    Tim Storms                                           Li Wenxing
               The 8 Hertz Kid                          Little Fiery Mario Vocal Chords

Epilogue
Thunder is the sonic aspect of lightning; the Schumann Scale is the musical aspect. Together, the sound of lightning and the music of the Schumann scale could inspire a flash of a song or even form an indie band itself using some kind of lightningy sounding-name, a band to rival the gods’ bands in the last battles of the bands that kills all of the bands off save one, what the Norwegians call…errr, don’t make me say it, not feeling very punny t’day, no y’know, oh God no God not thrice fast, oooh-kay: Ragnarock! Ragnarock!! Ragnarock!!!

Shout-outs:
My man, Buddha Thompson, will shred this scale like a ball of lightning on the new Los 2011. Martinnnnnnnnnn!

The Pi Tone

Drag your cursor across the black unstemmed noteheads.

THE PI TONE is derived from multiplying a tone, any tone, by the transcendental number Pi. In the above example, when the E is multiplied by Pi, you get a tone slightly flatter than a high C. This is the Pi tone. Written out as an equation in Hertz, it looks like this:

E 4    *    π   =  C 6

329.6 Hz    *    3.14159  =  1035.5 (10 Hz less than an equal-tempered C)


The Pi Tone covers the interval of a Minor Thirteenth. When transposed down an octave to a C5, it covers the interval of a Minor Sixth: (13 – 7 [8ve] = 6). There are three Minor Sixths’ in every diatonic key. In the key of C Major (C D E F G A B), they are E—C, A—F, and B—G. Play with them.

Tone * Pi. If you repeat this operation twice, and arrange all the tones in the same octave, you get the Pi Chord or augmented chord. The augmented is built up of Major Thirds. E G# C.

The Pi Chord

22 / 7

“Don’t disturb my circles!” screamed Archimedes as the pike entered his gut.
“Have a bath, Archimedes,” quipped the soldier, “In hell.”

The Train in Spain Falls Majorly on the Fade

Trains are in major keys, just like cars. The rhythms of the railroad helped shape Jazz and Rock music, like the shuffle of the human heart and the swung gait of a walking horse, major trains in 4/4 paved the way for the dominance of drumming in all music (after a brief buoyant classical period), where even songs without drums would somehow have drums, even Nemocore, even everything, and the ‘riddim’ as the Rastas know it, would mean everything to every song.

The Train Chord below is Major, as are all Train Chords, because of the Harmonic Series, the secret scale inside every tone that is itself a Major Chord.

For realistic railroad rhythms, rev the wheels up with multiple drags over the tracks. When the crescendos crisscross, drag onto the noteheads and let the cursor settle momentarily, then drag it off onto the staves or notationless Byss for a short rest. Finally, let the cursor settle on the noteheads till the doppler shifts.

>B Major 6th (1st Inversion)

This is the AirChime K5LA. One dissonant motherfucker. K Series. 5 horn bells. Low-manifold mount. American Factory tuning. Tuned to the Grid.Tuned to the Earth. The K5LA is a B Major 6th pentachord (D#, F#, G#, B, D#), but because of the inverted voicing, it can also sound like a G# Minor 7 (2nd Inversion), the B’s relative minor key. Yet due to the American city’s natural electric emphasis of the B-tone, the train chord will sound major from space.

Selfless Plug: Look for realistic railroad riddim on the upcoming 2011 Los Doggies album!