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Spring Hill

Welcome to Spring Hill—the town that rings in Spring. For whom does the bell toll? For the frog the bell tolls! And the snakes that sing themselves to sleep.

These days, where does one find inspiration and illumination? In the great arches and arcades of the past, or the mundane subspaces of today?

For the nostalgic weeaboos of Los Doggies, nothing short of a vintage 80s Gameboy game available only in Japan will suffice for the inspiration of a song.

The opening track of e’rebody, “Spring Hill”, features a pulsing cadence that divides itself like cells undergoing mitosis, a hook that sounds eerily similar to the Disney classic “Somewhere out there”, and a subtext from an old role playing game Kaeru no Tame ni Kane wa Naru (translated: For the Frog the Bell Tolls—a wordplay on Hemmingway’s famous novel For Whom The Bell Tolls).

Generally speaking, the song describes a town, much like the town where Los Doggies resides. There is a bell that plays the bellsong “Westminster Quarters” 12 times a day. The animals rise with the sun each morning, along with the townsfolk, as if scripted to do so, and at night they all sing themselves to sleep. It is a simple life, herein Spring Hill.

“Spring Hill”

Herein the town that rings in Spring
With frogs that toll and snakes that sing
And in this town the bell’s peæling
And rusted sounds come croaking in
My openings emptying out
The last of sounds come tolling out

And in the house the children sleeping sound
And dream of frogs who never peep a sound
Or snakes hissing themselves to sleep
They snore a leaf and keep it up and down

And everybody that ever passes through is struck by a chord
A slow vibration that passes through each of them and leaves them wanting more
Of the broken bells banging right beneath the birds like lovers in chord
Or the frogs and snakes gathered around the sound as brightly listed in the score

Herein the town that rings in Spring
Somewhere out there the Spring’s ringing

Herein the town that rings
And sings themselves to sleep
And snores a leaf aloft

Spring Hill is ringing long
With the sound of music’s song
And e’rebody sings along
For whom the frogs hath croaked

Full Album

Bar of the Beast

Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six.

The Universal Product Code contains the Mark of the Beast—666—from The New Testament, The Revelation, Chapter 13, paragraph 18. The three unidentified guard bars at the beginning, middle, and end of the barcode, each stand for a “six”, highlighted in the image above.

The UPC was invented by George Joseph Laurer. In the 80s, controversy arose when Christians and other conspiratorially-minded folk realized which number was lurking on every product in America. George has this to say in response:

There is nothing sinister about this nor does it have anything to do with the Bible’s “mark of the beast”. It is simply a coincidence like the fact that my first, middle, and last name all have 6 letters. There is no connection with an international money code either.

Ain’t that just something a cheeky Satanist would say? All things are numbered, of course, and it just so happens the inventor of the Satanic barcode has a coincidentally Satanic name in an industry that is openly Satanic.

So, now you know the weighty moral decision that Los Doggies went through in the printing of their new album: e’rebody. To mark with the beast and be brought into the Illuminati fold, or to forsake the Devil and not take advantage of universal digital distribution? Hmm, decisions…

Next thing you know, Los Doggies will be appearing on MTV2, showing off their eye of horus and monarch butterfly wings, shaking hands (Masonically) with the Queen of England, and headlining at the Bohemian Grove Opening Ceremony.

Lawd hav mercy.

e’rebody is here

The new Los Doggies is available on Bandcamp!

It will be available everywhere else shortly.

Jeopardy Melodies

Alex & Chu, my 2 waifu…

Jeopardy! has a theme song that everyone hums while they think. It’s the thinking man’s thinking song. Even the lyrics are hmms, or if you’re feeling fancy, doos.

Jeopardy! also has some classic sounds that act upon the listener like some Pavlovian magik.

If a player runs out of time trying to answer a question or no players respond, this is played.

Half-cricket, half-car horn; this sound is an alarming triplet of C major thirds. Like all alarm sounds—the door bell, convenience ding, and vehicular horn—the consonance of the major 3rd is a throwback to the Westminster Quarters bell song. The rhythm has a feel similar to the katydid. It is the sound of failure, worse than Trebek’s dead-eyed scowl.

This sound below signals the end of the round.

Eight semiquavers are played twice with a beat of rest between them. The “B” is reminiscent of industrial sounds—the beeping of home appliances or other warnings from the power grid.

There are other styles of sound on Jeopardy! besides distress signals, such as the the tonal blong from the Final Jeopardy answer reveal.

The blong resolves quickly from an E leading tone to an F tone. The Jeopardy! Theme song is in C Major, as are many of the show’s sounds. The Final Answer shifts the tonality up to the IV, like a plagal cadence. It seems to ask a question as it jumps up a whole octave to play the nearby F.1

Speaking of Fs…

Who is my waifu? Who is Chu?

More Jeopardy! to come…

Compare this tonality to the same idea used in Super Mario Bros. with the C Major Overworld Theme and F Kill Sound. The FM Bells and bloopy tones are also very Mario-like.

Copyright Melodies™

The world wide web is all abuzz this week with tales of high-profile plagiarism. First, actor Shira LeBoof was outed for stealing his short film from a comic book, and then he lifted an apology right off Yahoo Answers. Now, the music lawyers are at it again—accusing the sweetest most innocent boy band One Direction of plagiarizing a Def Leppard song.

Most likely, the bands’ respective publishers will have a protracted legal battle, with Mp3′s and score sheets submitted as evidence, a back-to-back listening party, and maybe even testimony from Def themselves.

The similarities between One Direction’s recent release “Midnight Memories” and Def Leppard’s 80s hit “Pour Some Sugar on Me” are numerous and obvious. They are in the same key, use the same I IV V chord progression, have the same attitude, melodies, rhythm, feel, instrumentation, and the hook is almost exact. Click on the two clips below to compare.

If Ray Parker Jr. had to pay Huey Lewis and the News for merely stealing the bassline to “I Want a New Drug” and using it in “Ghostbusters” (a superior song in every way), then surely the case of One Direction vs. Def Leppard will be settled in favor of the plaintiff.

In the old days, what One Direction did would be called “Variations on a Theme by Def Leppard” and that would be that—one composer paying tribute to another by appropriating their melodies. But any successful band is a business, and international bands like 1D are used to endless litigation. That’s why we have music lawyers in the first place—to squeeze a little more money out of our crappy music.

Picasso didn’t copy, he stole. So too, Shia.
And hey, even Weird Al Einstein stole. He didn’t even footnote!

One Direction “Midnight Memories”
Def Leppard “Pour Some Sugar on Me”
Huey Lewis and the News “I Want a New Drug”
Ray Parker Jr. “Ghostbusters”

J. Law and Illuminati Melody

Once in so ever, this here blog is trendy, if not downright trending upon trendy waters. So, a movie called Hunger Games: Part II came out a million years ago, and if you recall from our first installment, the sequel once again features this leitmotif de résistance.

After whistling this birdy little melody (with perfect pitch mind you), the old man in the video is swiftly singled out, taken onstage, and shot in the head. A simple 4-note figure in g-minor, whistled to the gesture of the three middle fingers held high—who would want to read into that? Who could possibly subscribe esoteric meaning to these random digits and tones?

Drag over the black stemmed noteheads. The motif resembles a minor version of the opening measure of Westminster Quarters clock song. The 4 tones reference a I → V harmonic progression. The first two notes suggest a G minor (I), while the last two notes, a D (major or minor, V is dominant). Interestingly, and Spoilers!, the original answer to this call is withheld in the sequel film, as befitting the second act in a 3-act drama, the tension is left open-ended with zero resolution. The melody beckons, like the sequels bait.

And that’s basically the breadth of this blog in the past, with maybe a final joke alluding to the Grand Musical Conspiracy, followed by an awkward goodbye and footnotes.

Many a youtuber make their daily ad bread from identifying these particular trends, tying them together with tight Masonic threads and neat Jesuit plots. Just go through the movie (or any movie) and point out all the monarch butterflies, Horus eyes, and pyramids you can find, and abracadabra: net-surfers will eat up this crypto-entertainment as readily as the weekly sex-n-health tabloids of yesteryear.

But will these dedicated bloggers correctly identify and repost the sigil/trigger above? Is there room enough in this niche for a musico-crypto-entertainment? Probably not; as we well know, the New World Order will not be notated.

We’ve mentioned Len Horowitz on this blog before, and the industry of healing tones. Lenny would happily spout the 440hz tuning conspiracy, the Committee of 120 Beats per Minute, and the Grid-tone/Earth-tone Connection, but does he have the nerve and the nerd to take on J.Law1 and her franchise fatale?

There’s an old saying that film is 60% music, or something like that, implying that in the final product, music is more important than the image. In the vast holographic deception that is our socially-engineered reality, how much percentage of importance does music hold over image? If symbols do indeed rule our world, then wouldn’t these symbols most likely be of the black and stemmed variety? Is there some all-hearing ear, inscribed in a spiral—the audio analog of the all-seeing eye?

Perhaps, the above motif goes back to the Pharaohs, passed down the Pharonic bloodline, appropriated by Manchurian maestros and remixed by today’s insider entertainers, where it’s gone viral. You can hear it in the wind and the leaves, in bird and child-song, whistled by mockingbird newscasters or played on the mighty wurlitzer. It is the piano figure that opens up the secret room behind the bookcase in a billionaire’s mansion. It is the trigger of our man-made psychosis, the sigil of our dead and dying gods.

Trend lightly friends. Enjoy your saturnalia.

Many of you might find it distasteful to use this moniker on anybody but Jude Law, and to that I say, get real fogey, alfie, go listen to your Now! CDs and stuff some sharkables in teh face.

Whistler’s Monkey

yo monkey Bonnie is an orangutan (not a monkey) living at the National Zoo who taught herself how to whistle. And get this: she doesn’t just whistle for food rewards! She actually—bear with me here—likes to whistle, although we can’t be sure. We have to put ‘likes’ in single quotes, because I still can’t understand why an animal would do something if not for a food reward.

Check out Bonnie’s whistle in the video below, which she basically invented in the vacuum of her lonely zoo cage. She must have been inspired by the breeze blowing across her rusty cage bars. How many people have invented whistling on their own? Probably, as many as have invented the alphabet.

Bonnie’s whistle is kind of like a bird call. She hits 3 notes, and then pauses. The interval she uses is about a whole tone between an F# and G#. There also bends on each note. The first seems to bend down, while the middle bends up, and the third bends up and down. It is notated as quarter-tone sharps below, to best approximate her portamento. Drag over the noteheads or click the score.

yo monkeyIt ain’t dixie, but what a tone—wet and full-lipped. Bonnie’s whistle sounds similar to a mourning dove call, but she isn’t copying the birds. Researchers have suggested that Bonnie picked up her unique talent from a former whistling caretaker.

Pretty soon, apes will be talking too, in American English one hopes. Although, even if Bonnie was singing Shakespeare sonnets, we’d still question her motivations.

Like, do you really enjoy this, or are you in it for the food rewards?